Advice on fishing

Globe-Fish_reflection
Originally uploaded by quantum bunny.

A young boy asked his uncle how he always managed to come home with a good catch of fish.

"Well, its. easy," he said. " First, go in the evening, and find some lake where the people are still fishing. Then sit down near where the boats come in, and put your line in the water, but without any bait on it. After that, lean back and open a cold beer. Before you know it, someone will come along with more fish than he wants to clean, and say to you,

'Want a pail of fish?' "

Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?

Originally uploaded by Special.

A contestant on "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" had reached
the final plateau. If she answered the next question
correctly, she would win $1,000,000. If she answered
incorrectly, she would pocket only the $32,000 milestone
money.

As she suspected it would be, the million-dollar question
was no pushover: Which of the following species of birds
does not build its own nest, but instead lays its eggs in
the nests of other birds?

Is it:

A) the condor;
B) the buzzard;
C) the cuckoo; or
D) the vulture?

The woman was on the spot. She did not know the answer. And
she was doubly on the spot because she had used up her 50/50
Lifeline and her Audience Poll Lifeline. All that remained
was her Phone-a-Friend Lifeline, and the woman had hoped
against hope that she would not have to use it because the
only friend that she knew would be home happened to be a
blonde. But the contestant had no alternative.

She called her friend and gave her the question and the four
choices.

The blonde responded unhesitatingly: "That's easy. The
answer is C: The cuckoo."

The contestant had to make a decision and make it fast. She
considered employing a reverse strategy and giving Regis any
answer except the one that her friend had given her. And
considering that her friend was a blonde, it would seem to
be the logical thing to do. On the other hand, the blonde
had responded with such confidence, such certitude, that the
contestant could not help but be persuaded. "I need an
answer," said Regis.

"C: The cuckoo."

"Is that your final answer?" asked Regis.

"Yes, that is my final answer."

Two seconds later, Regis said, "I regret to inform you that the answer is ... absolutely correct. You are now a millionaire!"

A few days later, the contestant hosted a party for her
family and friends, including the blonde who had helped her
win the million dollars. "Jenny, I just do not know how to
thank you," said the contestant. "Because of your knowing
the answer to that final question, I am now a millionaire.
And do you want to know something? It was the assuredness
with which you answered the question that convinced me to go
with your choice. By the way, how did you happen to know the
right answer?"

"Oh, come on!" said the blonde. "Everybody knows that
cuckoos don't build nests. They live in clocks."

What percent blonde are you?

light is fading
Originally uploaded by miss nomer.

*Blonde Test*
[ ] You have screamed at an inanimate object for 'hurting' you.
[ ] You have ran into a glass/screen door.
[ ] You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
[ ] You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.
[ ] You have ran into a tree/bush.
[ ] You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
[ ] You just tried to lick your elbow.
[ ] You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm.
[ ] You just sang them to make sure
[ ] You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
[ ] You have choked on your own spit.
[ ] You have seen the Matrix and still don't get it.
[ ] You've never seen the Matrix.
[ ] You type only with two fingers. (only sometimes...)
[ ] You have accidentally caught something on fire.
[ ] tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose.
[ ] You have caught yourself drooling.
[ ] You have fallen asleep in class
[ ] Sometimes you just stop thinking.
[ ] Sometimes when you are telling a story you forget what you were talking about.
[ ] People often shake their heads at your stories.
[ ] You are often told to use your "inside voice".
[ ] You use your fingers to do simple math.
[ ] You have eaten a bug accidentally.
[ ] You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important.
[ ] You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand/pocket the whole time.
[ ] You repost bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don't.
[ ] You break a lot of things.
[ ] You tilt you're head when you're confused.
[ ] You have fallen out of your chair before.
[ ] When you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture on the ceiling.
[ ] The word "ew" is used many times a day.
[ ] Your probably going to have to use a calculator to multiply this.
[ ] you have spelled you name wrong from 3-6 grade

Now add it all up multiply that by 4