1. The public ceremony in which your distinguished
ancestor participated and at which the platform
collapsed under him turned out to be his hanging.
2. When at last after much hard work you have evolved
the mystery that you have been working on for two
years, your aunt says, "I could have told you that."
3. You search ten years for your grandmother's maiden
name to eventually find it on a letter in a box in the
attic.
4. You never asked your father about his family when
he was alive because you weren't interested in
genealogy then.
5. The will you need is in the safe on board the
Titanic.
6. Copies of old newspapers have holes occurring only
on the surnames.
7. John, son of Thomas the immigrant whom your
relatives claim as the family progenitor, died on board
ship at the age of 10.
8. Your great grandfather's newspaper obituary states
that he died leaving no issue of record.
9. Another genealogist has just insulted the keeper of
the vital records you need.
10. The relative who had all the family photographs
gave them all to her daughter who has no interest in
genealogy and no inclination to share.
11. The only record you find for your great grandfather
is that his property was sold at a sheriff's sale of insolvency.
12. The one document that would supply the missing link
in your dead end line has been lost due to fire, flood,
or war.
13. The town clerk to whom you wrote for the
information sends you a long handwritten letter which
is totally illegible.
14. The spelling of your European ancestor's name bears
no relationship to its current spelling or pronunciation.
15. None of the pictures in your recently deceased grandmother's
photo album have names written on them.
16. No one in your family tree ever did anything
noteworthy, owned property, was sued or was named in a
will.
17. You learn that your great aunt's executor just sold
her life's collection of family genealogical materials
to a flea market dealer "Somewhere in New York City."
18. Ink fades and paper deteriorates at a rate
inversely proportional to the value of the data
recorded.
19. The 37 volume, 16,000 page history of your county
of origin isn't indexed.
20. You finally find your great grandparents' wedding
record and discover that the bride's father was named
John Smith.
