WMD

Subject: OT: WMD (Original Humor)
From: "Sanford Manley"
Newsgroups: alt.obituaries

US Soldiers Uncover Iraqi Nuclear Threat
by L.S. Clossey

BASRA, IRAQ (LSC)--Gen. 'Buck' Turgidson announced Friday the discovery of
vast hydrogen reserves concealed in the Persian gulf. Other alarming
evidence suggested the Hussein regime had been planning on using the
hydrogen to construct hydrogen bombs, or to crash a hydrogen-filled
dirigible into a soft target.

Every two hydrogen atoms had been carefully attached, possibly by Iraqi
scientists, to an oxygen atom. Indistinguishable from water, the
resulting compound had been stored in the Persian Gulf, possibly for
future use in hydrogen bombs. The total amount of hydrogen concealed is
still unknown, although the hydrogen/oxygen compound has been founded
throughout the Gulf, which covers a surface area of 92,500 square miles
(239,600 square km).

"There's enough hydrogen reserves here to build one hydrogen bomb for
every church-going man, woman, and child in America," said Gen. Turgidson.

Specially trained dogs sniffed out textbooks at a partially bombed-out
former high school in Basra. Some books included technical information
about the chemistry of this compound. Others, disguised as history
textbooks, included pictures of the Hindenburg explosion at Lakehurst
Naval Air Station, New Jersey, May 6, 1937. The 804-foot- (245-metre-)
long airship had been inflated by hydrogen.

A senior Bush administration official suggested that the President had
long suspected that the Hindenburg airship had been sabotaged by Saddam
Hussein.

The White House expressed surprise at the sudden discovery, which had been
scheduled for November 1.